I swore I would never let myself get fat again. Instead, I not only put all the weight I lost back on, I put another 20 - 30 pounds heavier. I have never looked or felt so terrible.
So I made myself get started again; can't just whine! Get out there, work on it!
I went back to the gym today and back to eating better. It would have been easy to push it to tomorrow, but I made myself go. I worked out for a half hour on the sky machine -- not a lot but it's something! And I felt good that I carried through with what I said.
Then I went to shower and change...
... and caught what I look like in the mirror.
So very ugly.
And every bit of good feeling and intention fled.
I'll still go back, but I can't get that horrible true image out of my head.